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HOW TO PRESERVE A HUSBAND

Be careful in your selection. Do not choose too young.
When selected, give your entire thoughts to preparation for
domestic use. Some wives insist upon keeping them in a pickle.
Others are constantly getting them into hot water. This may
make them sour, hard and sometimes bitter. Even poor varieties
may be made sweet, tender and good by garnishing them with
patience, well sweetened with love and seasoned with kisses.
Wrap in charity. Keep warm with steady fire of domestic
devotion and serve with peaches and cream. This prepared, they
will keep for years.

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