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BEST RUM CAKE

1 or 2 qt. rum
1 c. butter
1 tsp. sugar
2 large eggs
1 c. dried fruit
baking powder
soda
lemon juice
brown sugar
nuts according to how you feel

Before you start, sample the rum to check the quality.
Good, isn't it? Now go ahead. Select a large mixing bowl,
measuring supplies, etc. Check the rum again. It has to be
just right. To be sure rum is of the highest quality pour one
level cup into measuring cup and drink it as fast as you can.
Repeat...
With an electric mixer beat 1 cup butter in a large
fluffy bowl. Add 1 tablespoon thugar and beat again. Mean-
while, make sure rum is of finest quality. Try 1 more cup.
Open second quart if necessary. Add 2 arge leggs, 2 cups fried
druit and beat until high. If druit gets stuck in beaters, pry
loose with screwdriver. Sample rum again if second quart is of
highest quality. Even better than first one, isn't it?
Next sift 3 cupth thalt, or pepper (it really doesn't
matter). Sample rum again. Now add 1/2 pint lemon juice.
Fold in chopped butter and strained nuts. Add 1 tablespoon
brown thugar and any color, whatever you have. Grease oven and
turn cake pan to 350 degrees. Now pour batter into boven and cake.
Check rum again and go to bed.

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Accuracy is believed to be good, but is not guaranteed.
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